Money, as The Beatles song goes, can't buy you love. It probably also can't buy you the services of a legendary crooner like Frank Sinatra to serenade your beloved with a unique recording.
But if you were The Beatles' drummer, you could simply call in a favour from the Chairman Of The Board.
The first single to receive an Apple catalogue number was 'Those Were The Days' by Mary Hopkin, which was given the Apple 2 status.
However, Apple 1 was actually a totally one-off re-recording of 'The Lady Is A Tramp' sung by Ol' Blue Eyes, made in 1968 for Ringo Starr's then-wife, Maureen, who was a big Sinatra fan.
Retitled 'The Lady Is A Champ', Sammy Cahn rewrote the lyrics, personalising them for the surprise gift for Maureen's 22nd birthday.
The opening verse goes,
"There's no one like her,
But no one at all.
And as for charm
Hers is like, wall to wall.
She married Ringo
And she could have had Paul.
That's why the lady is a champ."
Only one copy was made and then the master tapes were destroyed.
Maureen died of leukaemia on 30 December 1994, with her four children, mother, husband Isaac Tigrett (one of the founders of the Hard Rock Café and House Of Blues) and ex-husband Ringo at her bedside.
Amazingly, this rare track has been up on YouTube since January 2010, and has only accumulated about 3500 views.
The quality isn't great, but, considering it's a bootleg, it's certainly listenable.
Experience a piece of musical history here:
Complete Lyrics:
There's no one like her
But no one at all
And as for charm
Hers is like, wall to wall
She married Ringo
And she could have had Paul
That's why the lady is a champ
Creates excitement
Whenever it's dull
She just appears
And there goes the lull
She merely smiles
And you're out of your skull
That's why the lady is a champ
The folks who do
And don't meditate
Agree she's great
They mean Maureen
I've got more lyrics
Right after this band
Because the lady is a champ
Though we've not met
I'm convinced she's a gem
I'm just F.S.
But to me she's big M
Mainly because
She prefers me to them
That's why the lady is a champ
I have lots of fans
Well at least one or two
But Peter Brown calls me
To tell me it's true
She sleeps with Ringo
But she thinks of you
That's why the lady is a champ
But I can boast, boast
As much, as much as I please
The fact is that's
She's his wife
Well that's life
But it's her day
So I whistle and stamp
Because the lady
The charming lady
Mr. Ringo's lady is a champ
May I toast you all the way
Lift my glass and softly say
I have thoughts for you this day
But beautiful thoughts for you
And for your Ringo
That I must express
With a warm and deep affection
Of F.S.
Would you kindly ask the guys
If they'd grab a glass and rise
'Cause I think we'd harmonize
But beautiful
May your birthday
And your birthday candles
Softly gleam and glow
For that would be
But beautiful I know
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