Noel Gallagher caused a swine flu panic by sneezing.
The Oasis rocker arrived in Venezuela with his bandmates this week and was amazed at how people are reacting to the outbreak of the disease - and was even more shocked when he received a worried telephone call from his mother.
He wrote on his blog: "It's all got a bit mad over here. This swine flu malarky is freaking people out. Landed at Crack'a**e airport yesterday. All the ground staff are wearing those little white face masks! ALL OF THEM.
"It was like something out of a Stephen King novel. I suddenly feel quite naked without one.
"Then if that wasn't bad enough my mam called me at that very moment and tells me to be 'careful' or I WILL die of pig flu. I swear at that point I did a massive sneeze and the entire airport fell silent and started to stare!! I WANT A MASK!!! (sic)"
After leaving the airport, things didn't get better for Noel.
When he arrived at his hotel, the 41-year-old musician discovered an armed guard waiting outside his room.
He added: "I currently have an armed guard outside my room! What does that say? Am I vulnerable to a robbery from room service? Anyway, could be worse, at least the sun's out and I have a balcony and it's 86C.
"Mind you, what about snipers (as Bobby Gillespie once said to me as we were getting p****d in my back garden)?? (sic)"