The Groupie Routine Lyrics

Frank zappa (lead guitar, vocals)

Mark volman (vocals)

Howard kaylan (vocals)

Jim pons (bass, vocals)

Don preston (keyboards, electronics)

Ian underwood (keyboards, alto saxophone)

Aynsley dunbar (drums)

I mean, really, really, I mean, you guys,

What can I say, you guys are my favorite band

You gotta tell me somethin,

Are you here in hollywood long?

I mean, I just...

No, Im ah, were recording here in town

Youre recording here?

Yeah, at the record plant

The record plant?

Yeah

Oh, bobby sherman records here

I just love bobby sherman and david cassidy

Do you know david cassidy?

No, i...

Have you ever run into any members of the tree dog night?

Joe shermy once i...

Oh! they are my favorite band!

Theyre so professional, I mean...

So creative...

How bout david crosby? I mean...

Hes so in, you know, i...

No, I never...

Hes...he just knows...

I mean, he almost cut his hair but he didnt

No, listen, ah, do you know how...

Do you know how to get to the chateau mormon from here?

Not exactly...is it by the, by the airport?

No no, we dont, we have a bus on this particular thing

Oh!

Yeah

Tell me one thing: do you like my new car?

Oh yeah! its a...pavilion, isnt it?

Oh, not just a pavilion, its a pauley pavilion

Oh!

Yeah, its real futuristic,

I like the little naked man turn signals

So ah, we gotta get up, you know,

And ah, go to the studio in the morning

And then we groove court for about two weeks

And then we ah, we leave again

Oh, really?

Where do you play when you go from here?

Ah, let me see...needles...

Oh oh! you guys are so professional

No, its nothing...

I mean the way you get to travel to all those exotic towns

You get to playin and playin in all these great sounding

Halls

Tell me somethin: do you really have a hitsingle in the

Charts now?

Right now, I mean, with a bullet?

Thats really important

Listen baby, would I lie to you

Just to run my fingers through your pukes?

Dont talk to me that way!

I am not a groupie!

I never said that...

Im not a groupie

Neither are my friends here

Jim and ian and aynsley and don and frank

None of us are groupies

Pleased to meet all you girls

Hiya howie...

Tell em, tell em, we dont...we arent groupies

Howard

Yeah

We only like musicians for friends

Thats right

You, you know, you understand?

We still wanna hear your record

You know, we still like to come in your bus
Frank Zappa - The Groupie Routine - http://motolyrics.com/frank-zappa/the-groupie-routine-lyrics.html
Listen now, on the other side of the record,

Didnt you say that you got off bein juked

With a baby octopus and spewed upon with cream corn?

And that your hair-lipped queen-o-bassplayin girlfriend

With the cross ties and the tits on her shirt

Had to have it with a hot seven-up bottle or you went up the

Wall?

Oh! howie...

Whats the deal, mama?

Howie, all thats true, howie

And sometimes I even dig it with a jack-in-the-box ring job

But howie, we are not, we are not groupies, howie

I told robert plant that

I told elton john

I told steve stills

Yeah

And he didnt even wanna ball me

I can see that...

Listen, the thing is baby, I want some action, you know

Im only here for a couple of weeks,

Recording at the record plant

With that naked statue in the bathroom and stuff...

Im horny as fuck!

Listen to me...

I want a steaming, succulent, juicy, drippy, ever-widening

Kind of a smelly, slimy, many folded,

Sort of in-and-out contracting sphincter

Kind of a hole with a, with a, with a...

Lets see, theres gotta be a way I can put this discreetly

Lets say we hop in the isle over those guys

And the blewin fuck baby!

Hey, hey, hey!

Im in this band man...

I told you that many times

No matter what goes on

Listen! it just so happens tonight

I mean, this is unbelievable

Are you a virgo

No...

I mean, it just so happens tonight

Me and my girlfriends, well,

We came here lookin for a guy from a group

Ah!

But just not any guy from any group

Yeah...

Were lookin for a guy from a group with a dik

Well, I can show you!

But hes gotta have a dik which is a monster!

(wow!)

Thats me!

You peeked!

Thats me, you little westward wench nipple-queen!

Take me, Im yours, you hole.

Fulfil my wildest dreams!

Oh! anything for you my most seductive pop star of a man.

Yeah?

Picture this if you can

Okay, Ill try...

Bead jobs

Knotted nylons

Bamboo canes

Three unreleased recordings of crosby, stills, nash & young

Fighting at the fillmore east.

Oh!

Two unreleased recordings of...of the grateful dead,

Sitting in with mel torme

Yeah!

No! i...

Oh! man! oh, i, I just...

I cant stand it!

Do you understand me baby?

I mean, I cant stand it!

I cant stand it!

I cant stand it!

...

I gotta see my baby!

I gotta...

I cant stand it!